A bit of a legacy from my Catholic upbringing this. I managed to lose god before it was too late but it's hard to get the memories of ceremony and sniff of incense out of your sysyem. If nothing else Catholicism is always good for a spot of bizarre and dark drama.
This thing is pretentiously but very accurately titled (there is even a label on it saying): “The application of mechanics to the practice of Devotions”.
I designed it as a foolproof aid to prayer and worship, practically guaranteed to help you gain favour with all the major God figures although tuned for the Catholic Christian one from my youth. It’s quite simple really:
Instructions for use:
1. Select your saint on the top roller from a choice of the 40 most useful and popular. Padre Pio is a new addition to the line-up and a pretty good all rounder. There will be a series of collector cards to follow.
2. Genuflect (optional) and light the, now electric, devotional 'candles' using the switch provided.
3. Type your invocation using the keyset. It's a QWERTZ arrangement, Southern Europe being better attuned than the north for this purpose. Try to be brief and to the point. remember, it's a machine so there is no benefit in being overly wordy or poetic.
4. As you key, the bell chimes in time, creating a solemn and holy atmosphere. This focuses the mind and draws attention to your spiritual condition.
5. Prayers will then be answered in the normal way only moreso.
It’s not fully complete yet but so far it has proven to be extraordinarily effective as well as decorative, far better than either unassisted prayer or simple secular wall adornments.
